Fingering sounds pretty simple: insert finger(s); pump in and out. However, there’s a lot more to it than that – at least, there is when a man really wants to send his partner into a fit of pleasure. There are many things men can do to improve their girl’s sexual enjoyment, including maintaining proper penis health and learning new sex positions. But taking a night here and there to focus on her and leaving the penis out of it can be a real treat for her, and may lead to hotter sex in the coming days. The following fingering tips will help a man give his partner a night she’ll surely remember.
1) Prepare. There are things a man should do before he’s even in the same room as his partner if he intends to enter a fingering session. It’s very important that he tend to his fingernails, making sure they are clean and trimmed. Any hang nails should be dealt with prior to getting anywhere near a woman’s sensitive area. He should also be sure to have lube on hand in case that is needed.
2) Ask her. Some women may be used to fingering as strictly a foreplay activity, and may be expecting sex to follow. A man should be upfront with his partner about not intending to follow up with penetration. Ask her: “Is it okay if we just focus on you tonight?” She should know that the reason for no follow-up sex is not a lack of desire on the man’s part; it’s rather that he wants to please her in a new way.
3) Get her going before going down there. When fingering is the featured event, it may be more enjoyable for her if there’s foreplay involved. Kissing and caressing are good places to start. Focus on her above-the-belt hot spots – neck, ears and nipples, for example. Don’t cut right to the chase; a man can try running his fingers along the outside of her panties, stimulating the clitoris gently, teasingly through the fabric.
4) Consider double stimulation methods. There are many different methods a man can employ to increase her pleasure. Most women require clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm, so he can consider different ways to stimulate her “C-spot” while his fingers are inside her. He could use one hand, with his index and middle fingers inserted and his thumb rubbing her on the outside. He could also use two hands, with the dominant one working the outside and the other working the inside. And, of course, he could rely on his tongue for clitoral stimulation while he fingers her.
5) Beef up on technique. What a man does with his fingers in there can determine whether she enjoys herself or not. He can pump in and out, varying depth and rhythm, feeling and listening for her response for cues as to what she’s enjoying most. Also, G-spot stimulation is generally considered key for a good fingering session. The G-spot is located one to three inches on the anterior wall of the vagina, and can be tricky to find. One good method is to insert a finger or two with the palm facing up, then to crook the finger(s) in a “come here” motion. Her response will be the best indicator as to when he’s hitting it. Varying the rhythm of G-spot stimulation can be immensely pleasurable. He can also mix it up by rotating his wrist for side-to-side stimulation rather than only using the crooked finger motion.
6) Play with positions. A woman can lie on her back with legs spread while a man either props himself up next to her or sits between her legs facing her. The woman may prefer to drape her legs over the side of a couch or bed. Also, a couple may enjoy having the woman sit on the man’s lap with her back pressed against him and her legs spread wide; this can be particularly intimate.